Tag Archives: pseudoscience

Alternate Title: How to Not Enjoy Your Life

Posted on March 23, 2025 | Leave a comment

I mean, really.

Leave a comment

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged , , ,

Crazy Look in My Eyes

Posted on March 20, 2025 | Leave a comment

So I can or cannot assume my neighbor is going to wear my skin like a suit based on the angle of his chin?

Leave a comment

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged , ,

Tea Party Tuesday: Aroma Oolong

Posted on March 19, 2025 | 3 comments

I have a heartbreaker for you, friends. This week’s tea is unavailable to you, tea plebians. The aroma oolong is from Tea Bud, and they only sell wholesale. I feel really badly about this, but not THAT badly, because I’m still posting about it, mainly due to the fact that the pictures turned out nicely.

Super dark! Really caffeinated! Very, very light flavor.

Don’t feel that bad, this tea is just okay. My mouth felt a little dry after drinking it, but it was really fragrant and it gives me a chance to share a little bit of information about oolong teas with you, dear reader. Oolongs (or wu-longs, if you’re fancy) are not definitively black or green and range from 8-85% oxidation, which is quite the range of flavors, caffeination, and coloration. This one, as I can easily tell by the shaking in my hands, is on the higher end of the scale. What makes an oolong an oolong is the process by which it is processed. Oolongs are withered under the sun, which gives them a twisted appearance. Isn’t that cool?

With the weekly caveat that I am STILL not a doctor, though my best friend is and so is one of my neighbors, oolongs are helpful with eczema, can prevent hardening of the arteries, and make you more alert. I don’t know why I’m not drinking this all day every day with a resume like that.

It’s available here for an unknown price if you’re a retailer looking to buy a ton of tea.

3 Comments

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged , , ,

Tea Party Tuesday: Pearl Tea

Posted on March 12, 2025 | Leave a comment

Y’all, I love pearl tea. It’s so delicate, so jasmine-y, and overall, just my favorite thing in the world. It’s with pleasure that I bring you this week’s tea:

Those tiny pearls expand to fill the pot almost completely with leaves, which is, to me, completely magical.

Those tiny pearls expand to fill the pot almost completely with leaves, which is, to me, completely magical.

Pearled tea is hand-rolled. I’m going to pause to let that sink in. Every tiny pearl is a long, lightly oxidized green tea leaf that a human being rolled into a ball. This boggles the mind! As we’ve covered before, green tea is an antioxidant, helps with weight loss, improves circulation, and is generally a wonder drug. I love this particular tea because it is so fragrant, so light, and so perfectly floral.

The downside of a lightly processed, delicate tea with a high degree of human involvement is that it’s a little pricey- about $10 an ounce. The good news is a little goes a long way; six pearls will make you a nice pot of tea, and you can resteep the leaves several times. The variations in the flavors are delightful. Just delightful.

My favorite pearl teas come from my work ($24 for 2 ounces) and, honestly, from Teavana ($12 for 2 ounces). You CAN tasted the difference if you’re discerning, but if you’re new to tea and want to get your feet wet before investing, the less expensive option is still great.

Have you tried pearl teas? Do you like them? Do you love them? Let me know what you think.

Leave a comment

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged , , , ,

Do they make rubber bracelets for people who can’t stop eating peanut butter cups?

Posted on March 7, 2025 | Leave a comment

If so, please consider donating to the fund to continue my habit. If not, look at this lady who uncovers frauds who get people to actually do what I just described (i.e., give money to strangers who pretend to have diseases but are actually just fine). The fact that this exists only furthers my fascination with Munchausen’s by Internet, which started with this article.

Leave a comment

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged , , , , , , ,

Tea Party Tuesday: Thai Nguyen

Posted on February 19, 2025 | Leave a comment

I’m taking back tea parties, y’all. After a couple years of tea parties being in the news for not-that-fun reasons, I’m ready to be excited about them again! I want tea parties to mean drinking tasty leaf-infused waters and relaxing with your friends. Maybe holding your pinkie out then tucking it back in because you feel stupid. Is that too much to ask?

I won’t keep you in suspense any longer: this week’s tea is called Thai Nguyen, a Teaism product my boss brought to us from a recent trip to D.C.

It’s a light green tea, and despite what the name may suggest, it’s a Vietnamese tea. According to my expert*, this is THE quintessential Vietnamese tea, suitable for helping you “savor the intricacies of Vietnamese tea” (I am not kidding, he really said those words to me). For my part, I found it to be a very pure expression of green tea. Great, now I’m talking like a jerk. It’s very aromatic, and can be a little bit much if you’re a sencha drinker.

With the caveat that I am not a doctor (I will offer this caveat each week, probably), I’ll tell you that green tea helps aid digestion and has anti-aging properties. It’s also mildly caffeinated, so it won’t make you get the shakes like coffee or tea or looking at a Red Bull sometimes does.

Thai Nguyen is $7.75 for 2 ounces and is available here, if you are so inclined.

* name withheld to prevent embarrassing him.

Leave a comment

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged , , ,

Tea of the Week: Red Bush

Posted on February 15, 2025 | 5 comments

I am in to tea, to be sure. My pantry is mostly half-full canisters from tea shops the world over, and my current job affords me a lot of access to weird teas. My boss brings them straight to me from China and Japan, so I don’t even have to go look for them! This is a convenient arrangement for me, but our shop is pretty small, so don’t go quitting YOUR job or anything. To the best of my knowledge, it’s a pretty tight market for caterers at tea shops in Louisville, Kentucky.

So I thought I would just haul out one of my teas each week and let you look at them, because they’re pretty and tasty. I’m no great expert on tea (though if you have any bourbon questions, please direct them this way), but I do enjoy it. Without further ado, your tea of the week is…Red bush!

Image

Okay, so it isn’t a surprise, since it was right up there in the subject bar, but please pretend to be really stunned for my benefit. I can wait. Thank you.

Red bush is a rooibos, or red tea, which means it is caffeine free. It’s got a lot of warm red fruit taste to it- strawberries and raspberries. It tastes a little gingery to me, too, but the other people who have tried it say it’s completely in my head. Teas of this classification are supposed to help with allergies and stomach “issues”, so I drink it any time I sneeze, just to be on the safe side. Allegedly, it also has antifungal properties, but I haven’t delved into that because…ew.

But! Even if it isn’t somehow a miracle bev, it is really tasty, so you should try it. It’s $12 for 3.5 ounces and is available right here.

5 Comments

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged , , , ,