Tag Archives: mustaches

Fantasy Life Update: The 5th Annual Southeastern Beard and Mustache Competition

This man won 1st place in the Freestyle 12 Inches or Greater division.

This man won 1st place in the Freestyle 12 Inches or Greater division.

So on Saturday, my friend Courtney and I went to the 5th Annual Southeastern Beard and Mustache Competition. I don’t really have any words to describe the scene. Back me up, other attendees: the crowd was close to 600 maybe, the Holy City Beard and Mustache Society (REAL THING) raised a couple grand for uterine cancer research, and some truly inspiring/hideous/amazing/artful/horrifying/America-loving facial hair was on display. The ladies’ division was also a sight to behold. You haven’t really lived until you’ve seen an adult woman in a girl scout costume sporting a beard made of Samoa cookies. There was an entire category (junior full beard) of boys who basically looked like my own personal LLBean boyfriend.

Did you know that there’s like, a competition circuit for this stuff? Well, now you do. I can only describe the entire event as an exercise in unbridled glee.

Have you ever been to a mustache contest? Did you know there was such a thing? Have you entered one?! If so, please sign here guaranteeing you’re my best friend for life.